Quotes/Caverns of Madness
Session 1 ;Beltarne chooses poorly. :Beltarne: shield is gonna take too long, if I move and attack, could i step to rat on horse, go to standing, and attack capped at 9? :GM: sure! don't hit the horse! :Beltarne: Swing! Miss! :GM: oops, do you hit the horse? Yes. :Beltarne: Great. :GM: the horse screams and collapses as you carve into it. The nymph's going to be mad at you. :Beltarne: "Gorm forgive me. Heal ya later, horsy!" ;Tactical decision making at its finest. :GM: Sithis, your turn. :Sithis: ok. a moment, I thinking :Sithis: I attack the rat in front of me :GM: Genius! ;Arganyev discovers why we don't fight while lying on our backs. :Arganyev: Yes, a rat is challenging me in close combat! :Lenia: Think of it more like 'A biting, squealing, twisting thing about the size of a five-year-old is on your chest and trying to eat your eyes.' - it puts things in perspective. ;Arganyev grasps the meaning of 'adversarial GM'. :GM: Rat attack! as they bite Arganyev's face. Two hits! :'''Arganyev: You are enjoying this! :Beltarne: We all are. :Lenia: Of course he's enjoying this, he's a DF GM. ;Beltarne returns to the horse he inadvertently attacked. :Beltarne : I guiltily groom horse before bedding back down. :Ricka: "I hate you, you runty would be murderer!" :Beltarne: "I dinnae know what ye're talkin bout. Show me where the beastie is hurt? I don't see any holes. And I promise to buy the poor thing some carrots an apples, soon as we get back tae town." :Ricka: "Here, where you put your axe in it! Before you used your dark satanic pleas to make it look better!" :Lenia: "He was trying to defend the poor creature, and he's healed it. All the same, Beltarne, let Ricka do her job. I'm not sure the horse likes you." :Ricka: "She doesn't! She doesn't like runty axe murders at all!" :Beltarne: I see no holes. You must have imagined me trying to remove its leg." waves hands wildly "This is nae the short an handsome axe wielder ye are lookin foer!" :Ricka: "Harummph!" :Loegaire: "Ah yes. The battle axe. A refined, precise sort of weapon..." ;More excellent tactics :GM: combat time. Sithis, roll perception for your danger sense. :Sithis: I kill the narrator, can I? :) :GM: No =) ;Arganyev was badly bitten by rats in the face :Arganyev: I ready my shield, my sword, and my face... ;Beltarne and Lenia are discussing what do about a pair of wounded, flesh eating apes that just attacked the delvers. :Lenia: "Beltarne, help me here? They'll die if we just leave them." :Beltarne: "Aye, they will, an' thats what nature is all about, init? The strong survivin, the weak being killed by those that have opposable thumbs an metalcraftin'!" ;Loegaire and Lenia continue the discussion. :Loegaire: "Have you given any thought to what you're going to do with an injured giant killer ape? 'Cause I know what we can do with a dead one..." :Lenia: "I'm surprised you can be so callous about it, Loegaire. They're creatures of nature just like us." :Loegaire: "Right. Except for the very important point that they tried to kill us!" :Lenia: "Were trying. Aren't now. Someone get the rope out of my pack." :Loegaire: "You want to hold a benefit for the plight of the giant killer ape? Great. You want a whip-round for a battered killer ape shelter? Fine. You want to heal the killer ape, then sleep next to it? You and me got a problem." ;Beltarne demonstrates a keen understanding of nature :Beltarne: Are there any body parts on these things that might be worth something? :GM: Roll Naturalist (default IQ-6) to figure that out. :Beltarne: Failure! I think their blood cures cancer. :GM: You can't imagine why anyone would care about anything from nature for any reason whatsoever. Session 2 ;Thog proves to be useful. :Narrator: The goblin's boiled leather armor fails to stop the small javelin that Thog launches at him. He drops to the ground, bleeding out from a gaping chest wound. :Beltarne: heh. Thog's kind of handy. ;Thog proves to be dangerous. :Narrator: An arrow almost hits Thog's heart, then veers off for no obvious reason other than Lenia's sudden chant. the other just grazes his skin, leaving an insignificant bruise. :Thog: "Huggies for the Mage!" :Lenia: "Please, God, no." ;Singeon and Lenia clarify roles. :Singeon (yelling to Lenia): "Bring my pack!" :GM (aside): Apparently, you're his porter. who knew? :Lenia: "There are something like three backpacks on the ground here. I can't even bloody lift them all, you lunatic!" ;Arganyev has been knocked over, again. :Lenia: For a holy man, Arganyev spends an awful lot of time working on his back. ;Thog proves to be disturbing. :Lenia: I was raised by a delver. I loot the bodies. :Thog starts stuff one of the gobbo corpses into a sack. :Singeon: "Hey, what for, Thog?" :Thog: "Lunch." :Lenia: "..." :Beltarne: "bleargh, they're all yours my large friend" :Singeon: "you don't have to offer me any. Already ate!" :Lenia: "We have perfectly good rations, Thog. We'll even share." :Sithis: "Thog cannot eat goblins, at least in front of Lenia." :Thog: "Lenia want some Gobbo?" :Lenia looks pale. Paler. That's a feat. :Sithis: "No, Lenia don't likes people eat others creatures." :Lenia: "Actually, if he wants to eat the goblins I haven't got any moral objection. It's just the aesthetics of it. Goblins stink." :Thog: "If you gots other food, Thog leave gobbo here. No like the taste, anyway. Not like Halfling... yummy!" ;Thog proves to be quite useful. :Sithis: "I want the crossbow." :GM: You can't cock it Sithis - it has a metal bow and is too strong for you. :Thog: "Here." Thog cocks crossbow easily. :Sithis: "Well." :Thog: "Dere." :Beltarne: "Thog sure is handy." ;Singeon wishes he had more CPs. :Narrator: Though the delvers looked, they couldn't see anything in the shaft - most of them could barely see it at all. :Singeon curses his human eyes ;The GM knows all :Singeon: Singeon stops crouching. Wants action. Does a full move. :GM: About time, Mr. overconfident. ;The GM tells it like it is :Singeon: Move and attack- dual sabers - wild swings. Miss by 6 and 4. :Singeon: Oh well. :GM: You totally kill that evil wood block holding up the ceiling. The goblin, not so much. ;Paranoia, self destroyer :Narrator: Ahead of you, there is a small opening near the canyon floor. :Singeon: "I feel like we are being watched." :Lenia: "You always feel like we're being watched." ;The delvers object to the narration again. :Narrator: Elated on their effortless victory, the delvers plunged into the mines. :Thog: Crawled :Lenia: Effortless? I'm down like 6FP here. It's like a marathon. Session 3 ;Thog is easily tricked. :Arganyev: "We have an ogre in our back!" :Thog: "GAH! Where!" :Arganyev understands it is Thog! :Thog: "Oooh. Thog see what you did there..." ;The delvers encounter crushrooms. :Thog (after taking a 4d hit): What kind of damage roll was that? :GM: Right, the crushrooms are weird mutant mushrooms with mouths on the top of their caps and insane strength. One of them is eating Sithis and another is preparing to eat Thog. :Sithis: And the "seta" Crushroom is happy? :) :GM: Oh. Uhm, it's making satisfied noises as it eats Sithis, I suppose. ;Lenia continues to argue with the narrator :Narrator: The situation is desperate! Even the mage is forced into physical combat as the crushroom focus on eating Thog! :Lenia: To heck with 'forced'; it's just far more efficient. Apparently I can't pick a spell list to save my teammates' lives. ;More crushroom fun :Arganyev (shouting encouragement): "Stand up and fight, Thog! Don't be crushed by flesh eating vegetables!" :Singeon: Bit of philosophy, that is. :Sithis: I'm unconscious, but I dream with Lenia healing the seta.... sense of the nature... ug... :Lenia: "Actually, I'm pretty sure these are fungi, which are neither animal nor vegetable. That said, they're walking around and trying to eat us, so I'm not sure how to classify them." :Singeon: Classification: Thog like (eats people) :Lenia: Mushroomicus Eatingussicus. :Beltarne: Ohshitthey're strongasaurus. :Singeon: That's it, I'm learning taxonomy when we get back to Polisberg. :Singeon: I charge the crushroom, hit it twice, and do 16 damage. "Take that varmint we cannot classify!!!" ;Sithis takes action after being knocked unconscious :GM: Sithis, your turn. :Sithis: dream.... :GM: Right, right. ;Thog is a brawler :GM: You knock it down and it stops moving. :Thog: "HAH!" :Arganyev: ! defeated with a Thog PUNCH! :Thog: Thog right hook! ;More taxonomy studies :Singeon: "Die.... unclassified creature!!!" :Lenia: "Fungus." :Sithis: "or seta." :Arganyev: "that was Tofucthulu" :Thog: "Setaplastante!" ;The delvers need to get up the chimney in a hurry :Thog: Can I ready Lenia? :GM: Yes. :Lenia: No. o.o; :GM: Are you stopping him, Lenia? :Thog: "Don't worry. Me aim." :Lenia: "I'd rather not be thrown?" :Arganyev: "Don't worry, it is exciting! Beltarne, throw up Thog!" :Beltarne: "I'll get right on that." ;The GM only provides so much sympathy :Beltarne: "Hurry, lass! Our friends be needing us!" :Lenia: "If I could climb faster, I would!" :Arganyev: Climbing is slow :GM: well, yes. Sorry. :Arganyev: Thog could make the thing faster . . . :Lenia: If people hadn't run ahead and tripped an ambush, the party would still be together and climbing wouldn't be an issue. :GM: Well, yes. Not so sorry. =) :Arganyev: We can discuss that while the children rips our throats here ;) ;Dungeon physics can be strange :GM: You can just climb up the chimney, Thog. :Thog: You said I wouldn't fit? :GM: No, just that you couldn't jump. :Arganyev: anxiety makes you thinner :GM: All dungeon passages are conveniently sized so you can, at least, barely fit through. Session 4 ;Mark is showing pictures of his scarred face after being bit by a dog. :Demonsbane: I hope a good healing, without scar :Nate: Nah, chicks dig scars :Mark: But now we know what Arganyev looked like after the rats fed on him. :Nate: heh :Harald: Cars, Nate. :Harald: Chicks dig cars. :Nate: Tomato, tomato. :Nate: ...That really doesn't convey well in a written medium. ;Lenia discovers that not Concussing your friends makes them happy. Who knew? :Narrator: The ball of concussive energy touches ground beneath the skull, and there is a loud thunderclap. The delvers blink, and when they look again, the flaming skull is completely gone. :Beltarne: Shaka-khan! :GM: And she didn't hit her allies, either. Weird. =) :Singeon is awed. That says something. ;A discussion of tactics :Sithis: "but... why are there so many bodies in the floor, if the skull are so... feeble?" :Singeon: "Feeble? Only because I worked 'em down." :Lenia (shooting Singeon a glare): "Because who worked them down? And what's this --" she kicks at the torch, getting it away from the books "-- doing on the potentially valuable loot? Did you just forget that we were here to collect Dunner's writings?" :Singeon: "A distraction. It didn't work anyway." :Beltarne (slapping Singeon on the back of the head): "Think of better distractions, moron, preferrably one that doesn't send up $10000 in smoke." Session 5 ;Simple questions, strange answers. :Singeon: "I don't want to camp here... i got a bad feeling. As always." :Arganyev: "Singeon, what is the worst can be happening?" :Singeon: "Some demigod is tracking me to torture me for 1000 years." ;Delver wisdom :Lenia: Thoroughness is the road to profit and glory. ;Smart-asses :Singeon: Tunnels are dark, right? :Arganyev: and left: entirely lacking of any light. ;Another discussion of tactics ends well :GM: Sorry! It's a swarm of wasps, not spiders. That makes more sense. :Singeon (whispering): "The snake is mine." :Lenia: "I don't think the snake is the problem. Those wasps may be, though." :GM: Uhm. Wasps. Yeah, they're angry too. They'll attack anything, except other animals due to interspecies courtesy. :Thog: "Thog not like getting bitten." :Beltarne: Create Air might be effective. :Lenia: Yeah. :Beltarne: Or center the Concussion on the wasps. :Lenia: I'd rather disperse the swarm. :Beltarne: Hippy. ;The obligatory bit where people argue with the narrator :Narrator: Lenia speaks, and the walls ahead echo with thunder. Aside from wincing, Singeon and Sithis are unaffected, but the bats flutter in agony and run into walls. :Beltarne: You know bats actually have decent vision, unfortunately. :GM: Poetic license. and no, I didn't. ;Strange questions, simple answers. :GM: Why does Lenia have more DR than Beltarne? :Lenia: Because I'm a munchkin. ;Some questions are easy to answer. :Narrator: Rocks continue to pour from ceiling, rapidly getting larger and larger, until a cascade of rocks larger than your heads half-fills the tunnel. Anyone standing beneath that mass would be crushed! :Narrator: Thin cracks spread out on the floor, racing towards you, and more pebbles begin to drop from the ceiling. :Singeon: Can we run past it? :GM: Past the 4' tall mound of rocks? No, running past that would be hard. ;Some rules are easy to explain :Arganyev: run! :GM: your move is 4. :Arganyev: I add 1 yard more, for sustained running? :GM: Not on uneven ground while tremors are knocking rocks out of the ceiling and it's dark. :GM: Just saying. :Arganyev: yes, I remember that now. ;Sometimes the situation is desperate, with a cherry on top. :Narrator: A faint light shines ahead of Sithis, illuminating the way that the tunnel floor gives way sharply. In front of her, a chasm. Behind her, the tunnel collapses. :Narrator: Also, there's a swarm of wasps. ;Some questions are very hard to answer :Wasps: The wasps swarm Thog. :Arganyev: "What a demonic bent in ignoring their own fear and biting to us to our deaths!" :Wasps: More wasps swarm Arganyev and Beltarne. :Wasps: Each of them takes 1 damage. :Arganyev: "Isn't this a bit strange? Sure the Tome has something to do..." :Sithis: "The tome is mine! remember!" :Lenia: "No, I think we've just pissed off a really large swarm of wasps by bringing a cave down on their heads." :Singeon: "You think?" Session 6 ;Lenia doesn't handle pain well. :Lenia: What I want to say: "There is a rope. There is time to use the rope. Stop panicking." What I actually say: "OH GOD GET IT OFF GET IT OFF GET IT OFF!" ;The GM is cruel :Singeon: I can jump 19 feet :GM: You can probably make it in 1 go with a Jumping check. :Singeon: Okay :Narrator: Singeon leaps into space! :Singeon (yelling): "I never miss" :Sithis: and?? :Arganyev: success? :GM: Dunno, he doesn't land until next turn =) :Singeon: Tease. :Arganyev: that is suspense ;Thog leaps across the chasm immediately after Singeon :Thog: SUPER-OGRE-RUNNING-JUMP! :Sithis: Thog, don't jump, please,perhaps the others need of your help :GM: He's gone, hurtling in the air. :Singeon: He gonna crush me, ain't he? :Thog: Yup :GM: Likely. :Narrator: Singeon touches down on the far side, safely. :Thog: Safe is such a relative term... :Arganyev: jump back and try again! :Singeon: I want to acrobatic roll out of anyones way that may land on me :GM: Sure, all-out defense and a turn. I'm good with it. :GM: You land and flip to see what's coming - mainly, Thog. :Arganyev: The Ogre Menace ;Assigning blame :Arganyev: I remember the beautiful days, before these Thunderclaps... All was so easy, our lives so comfortable... :Lenia: "It's not my fault notbody noticed the cavern was unstable! Get these bats off me!" ;Singeon has convinced the others of his importance :GM: You see - a door. Light shines from above, from no visible source. It's just bright, like daylight. :Singeon: Magical, maybe? :Arganyev: its no more than your own spotlight, Singeon ;Ogre-Dwarf hostility :Thog: Aim! :GM: what are you aiming at? :Thog: Other side :GM: you draw a bead on Beltarne. :Thog: That works ;Thog isn't always helpful :Arganyev: I swing to the other side, or at least I try to do it :GM: well, you had a bad start, and swing out into the chasm, but don't quite make it to the far side. like a pendulum, you swing back. :Arganyev: I'm a pendulum. "Help me, Beltarne! push me to the other side!" :Beltarne: "Nae, laddy, that's not the way!" :GM: Beltarne attempts to push you or grab you or something but doesn't manage. :Thog: Tie rope to arrow, Thog Shoot Arganyev, pull him this side! :Thog: Yes? :GM: laughs hysterically :GM whispering to Thog: Good plan! ;Clever planning doesn't trump poor execution :GM: The tunnel is just slightly taller than Thog. The door is a normal door, slightly taller than Arganyev. It has Polisberg hallmarks on it. :Thog: I poke the door with my staff. :GM: You hear a sharp hissing sound, like someone drawing in breath, from the far side, but nothing else. :Lenia: "I'm worried about what's on the other side of that door." :Thog: Poke the door again. :Singeon: I'm glad you are seeing things my way, Lenia. :Singeon: They are out to get us, you know. :GM: You guys hear faint clinking noises, like someone getting their gear ready. :Arganyev: ok, I agree about resting here, if cracks aren't pursuing us now :Lenia: "I don't think we have time to rest, people. A charge out that door could push us into the chasm." :Singeon: We may not have a choice :Sithis: I hide :Thog: Thog knocks on the door. :Thog: "Hello? Youse there?" :Arganyev: I wait :GM: No one responds. At the door, I mean. :Sithis: Thog, can you throw down the door?; :Thog: "Hello?" Thog Knocks again. :Singeon: "Candygram!" :Lenia: Have I got time to pull out a fresh vial of Paut? I really need the energy back. :GM: Sure, we're not on combat time. :Thog: "Gold delivery!" :Singeon: I don't need to be a tactical expert to know we lost the element of surprise here. ;The delvers are anxious :Sithis: I enter in :Arganyev: we enter :Singeon: Im going! :Sithis: I enter more in :Singeon: I double enter. :GM: hey, crack monkeys - calm down a second while the GM explains what's going on. :Narrator: The delvers stepped into a room, apparently molded out of the living stone. :Thog: 'Crack monkeys?' :Singeon: Monster Manual V: South Central Creatures, I believe ;Someone critically failed their Hidden Lore check :GM whispering to Lenia: Though this looks something like a Peshkali, it's actually a variant demon beast. You can't kill it's arms. You need to cut off the tail and the head. Also, don't get close - it has a stinking breath. :GM whispering to Arganyev: This is a peshkali. it's a guardian demon. you can't kill it until you cut off the arms. it the meantime, it will kill you. ;Peshkalis are complicated :GM: sorry, had to look up a metric butt ton of rules there. :Singeon: That what GURPS is all about :Jake the Canuck: I believe that's metric butte-tonne ;The GM is unsympathetic :Singeon: I have 2 HP left, I am at 1/2 move :Arganyev: Im at 1 HP ;) :GM: hmm. well, that's a problem. for you. fortunately, she's out of attacks. ;Thog is cool, but so is the Peshkali :Thog: Fast draw arrow, shoot demon. :GM: from a prone position? with your allies in the way? cool. :Thog: ...Prone? :Lenia (Harald387): Failed the knockdown/stun check, remember? :GM: you fell down when you were stunned, like everyone else in GURPS rules. :Thog: I guess I can hold the bow sideways? Gangsta-style? :GM: you're a heroic archer. if you don't take a penalty for running, why take one for lying down? you don't get your Acc bonus, though. :Thog: Whoo-hoo! :GM: I really do think it's cool. you're at a -4 for Singeon being in the way, though. :Thog: ALL-OUT ATTACK: Determined... Success! by 5 :GM: well. :Thog: "DIE, SNAKE-LADY!" :Demon: Dodge... Success! by 1 :Thog: twitch :GM: she's fast. did I mention she's fast? ;Sithis gets creative :GM: you stab the circle. nothing happens except you mar it some. :Sithis: and the demon? :Arganyev: she is having good fun :Sithis: she feels something?; :GM: she looks at you and hisses, but is busy killing and being carved up by Arganyev and Singeon. If something happened to her, it isn't immediately apparent. ;Silly question :Singeon: Step, Feint, Attack a Weapon Arm. There is a weapon arm available here, yes? :GM: Singeon, yes, six of them =) ;Peshkalis are hardcore :Thog: This time for sure... Arrow goes in the bow: :Thog: Arrow goes in the demon: :GM: you drive another bolt into her. she seems annoyed... but not, you know, inconvenienced. :Singeon: Don't annoy her! Kill her! :Thog: Should I even bother with the damage? :GM: No. Supernatural Durability is a bitch and half. ;Someone's right, someone's wrong :Lenia: "You idiots, this is Dunner's guardian demon. Take off her head and her tail!" :Singeon: "I did the head pretty good." :Lenia: "So do it again!" :Arganyev: "Her power is in her arms, Lenia!" :Lenia: "That would be for a normal demon! This one's different!" ;We agree :GM: you cut into her tail, half severing it. she drags it limply on the ground now. :Singeon: wink at her. She can't have me no matter how hard she tries. :Singeon: I realize that made no sense. ;Celebrating victory with bad puns :GM: her sword arms are all cut up - she's only get 1 good arm, with the spear in it. you proceed to whack it off. :Arganyev: how many arms remain? The spear one , and the shield one? :Thog: 0 arms remain. :GM: technically, the peshkali should survive for 1 more round with her shield arm, but she has absolutely no offense, so I think the 3 of you can remove a half-crippled arm. :Thog: She is officially 'armless. Session 7 ;The GM argues with a player :Arganyev: "what is that book, again? More summoning mini-manuals?" :Narrator: The Tome is really more of a summoning macro-manual. ;Lenia can be literal. :Singeon: "I vote we explore the door. My blades scream for blood!" :Lenia: "You should get that checked out by a cleric." ;Sometimes a good idea isn't. :GM: As Sithis runs forward and down the steps, she notices all kinds of caltrops and spikes stuck in the stairs. She dodges them easily. :GM: one of the rotted boards begins to give, but she easily leaps over it. :Arganyev: I try to follow Sithis path, for avoiding caltrops as she did an instant before :GM: You don't step right... but your tough boots absorb the damage. :GM: You do manage to step exactly where Sithis did - on the weakened board - and it breaks beneath you, dropping you do the ground. :Sithis: Why I don't take damage? :GM: You're not taking damage because you see in the dark, weigh almost nothing, and dodge caltrops. Arganyev doesn't have these advantages. ;Interpretation :Zombie: "grrrr" the zombie guardsmen stand ready. "arg" the zombie slingers twirl their slings and aim. :Arganyev: "Arg? What do they mean?" :Lenia: "They mean 'eat the holy warrior first', I'm sure." ;The GM's disappointment leads to a discussion of professional standards :Zombie: 2 of the slingers release. one hits Thog, the other hits Lenia. Lenia may dodge. :Lenia: Deflect Missile. :GM: Yourself or Thog? :Lenia: Myself. :Lenia: Deflect Missile. Critical Success! :Arganyev: ! :GM: fine, fine, by the way. both sling stones are deflected. :GM: Some days, it's hardly worth trying to kill a bunch of delvers. :Lenia: Well, we're professionals. :Arganyev: sure :GM: You guys almost forgot to loot a chest. ;Bridging the language barrier :Sithis: bah, pig skeleton! :GM: Pig skeleton? :GM: whatever. :Arganyev: it was an insult, in Spanish, again... :Sithis: yes, a pig skeleton! :GM: I'll have to remember that one. ;GM gets frustrated :Singeon: I wanna be a zombie :GM: then stop using luck when I hit you! ;Fodder, worthies, and zombie hit points :Zombie: the zombie guard remembers he's a worthy foe, not a minion, and recovers from stun. though he is disarmed. drat. :Arganyev: so Skeleton B 3 is a "tough"? I mean, a worthy. :Singeon: He and i are dancing :GM: Yeah, these are worthies. :Arganyev: all them, including slingers? :GM: there's no point in having 8 million bajillion hit points if you fall down on a single hit. :Lenia: More importantly, IT means a lot less if one hit kills you. >.> ;Honest and bragging :GM: Thog misses his target, but hits the zombie next to it. :Thog: "That not zombie Thog aim for!" :Lenia: "You're not supposed to advertise that, Thog." :Thog: "Thog honest! Not clever!" ;Blowing holes in the language barrier :Sithis: I take my personal basis and I do fire for burn this zombie so heavy :GM: Say that again? :Sithis: I take my "personal basics" from my gear, :Sithis: and I do fire for to burn the zombie :Narrator: Sithis drops a knife and replaces it with an alchemical match, then uses the match to ignite the zombie. It begins burning and mostly stops moving. Session 8 ;Scottish, Pirate, Swedish, something. :Beltarne: "Aye, I be morre than able to push forrwarrd. Bettar that we catch them unawarres now!" :GM (whispering to Beltarne): I see your pseudo-Scottish accent is as bad as mine. :Beltarne: (whispering): I have to be careful or I end up in Swedish chef territory. ;Vanity :Singeon: I run at Lobsterman 4 and running broad jump across water. :GM: The water is only knee deep, though. :Singeon: Don't wanna get my boots wet :Lenia: Translation: This gives him an opportunity to show off. ;Predictability :GM: Lenia blocks the shot and will be hit instead! :Lenia: Deflect Missile. :GM: I know that. :GM: Lenia's spell harmlessly deflects the attack. ;Allies, obstacles... :Thog: can I see lob6? :GM: There's a lot of stuff in the way. Doesn't look like it to me. :GM: By "stuff", I mean Singeon and his dance partners. ;Good roleplaying isn't always good tactics :Singeon: I acrododge! :Arganyev: "he dodges successfully, creating a neologism" :GM: Not wanting to have your arm broken and your crushed body tossed in the water, you jump out of the way. :Singeon: I consider that a wise choice. +5 cp for excellent roleplay! :GM: Ha. whispering to Singeon, Wise choices, and Singeon? More like -5 for poor roleplaying. =) ;The enemy isn't helpful. :Arganyev: folks, anyway, I don't see any apparent exit from this damned "room", perhaps we should go out from here? These guys don't seem very cooperative in the idea of being defeated by us. ;The delvers start agreeing with the narrator and arguing with each other :Narrator: The purple ball strikes Arganyev's back, and tendrils of energy crawl up his spine. As they touch his helmet, they shimmer and disappear. Arganyev shakes his head briefly. :GM: That was anticlimatic. Guess I'll just have to kill you. :Arganyev: ha! :Lenia: Welcome to my world, mister lobsterman wizard. :P :Sithis: do you want to kill Arganyev too?? :Lenia: There are moments... :Sithis: yes, I know :) ;We need a literary precedent :Sithis: just Gandalf says the others run against the Balrog... :Sithis: why us can't run out? :Singeon: Gandalf never fought lobsters :Singeon: Really not much of an argument, I know... Session 9 ;Maybe Sithis has too many weapons :Sithis: in fact, I have nothing in my hands :GM: no, you had 2 silver knives, dropped 1, and drew a goblin knife. :Sithis: but, where are my knives? I don't know :GM: You have 1 in each hand, plus another 11 strapped all over your body. :Sithis: then, I have 1 knife in my hand... good, then I put it in the eye of lobster 6! :Lenia: Redefining 'overarmed'... ;Good descriptions don't always equal good luck. :Lenia: All-out (strong) staff swing, telegraphed, for the skull of the helpless, badly wounded disgusting abomination against nature at my feet. :GM: Heroic! :Lenia: Some things just need a-killing. Proceeds to roll poorly, even using her luck. :Lenia: *cry* ;What she said :Narrator: The last lobsterknight brings his blade back around and smashes it into Singeon's crossed sabers. Shards of ebony fly everywhere as the blade shatters. :Singeon (yelling): "I planned that!" :Arganyev: you don't need to say it! :Lenia: Singeon is clever, not honest. ;Judging capabilities :GM: The last lobster knight loses control of his shield as he tries to flee. Then he's knocked around a bit. And, uhm, killed. :Singeon: "Thats a warning to our new friends!" :GM: The 4 new lobstermen take heed of the situation and dive back into the water. :GM: combat is over (I assume the 6 of you can kill 1 stunned, crawling, wounded elder spawn). :Singeon: I don't know about that! :GM: I'll take it on faith. ;More language issues :Sithis: "Perhaps Beltarne?" :Beltarne: "Nae, I aen't got a kit on mae, but I think a lil' work wit' one oa Sithis' fine knives be thae thing." :Arganyev: "We need a more delicate surgery, mate." :Beltarne: "Aie be kennin tha cuttin', but on thae men, not on thae beasties." :Singeon: Do you speak common? :Beltarne: If I start going "Bork Bork Bork" I'm broken. ;More delver wisdom :Sithis: "Guys! I find my knife and a lot of coins, look!" :Lenia: "Coins? We like coins. Coins don't require negotiation for value." ;The ongoing debate :Singeon: "If you look closely at those stars over there, they are in the shape of me." :Lenia: "You should probably get your eyes checked along with your swords." ;Poetic? :Singeon: Fast-draw rapiers and move like a thing that moves fast! ;A failure to agree on the course of action :Lenia: "Hang back, everyone. I think I can probably talk some peace into them." :Singeon, Arganyev, and Sithis charge forward. :Lenia: "You guys have such an excellent grasp of 'Hang back'." :Arganyev: Lenia is very able to make a negotiation, folks :Sithis: with bandits? I disbelieve :Arganyev: well.... I move forward, running all the possible with my shield raised for cover! :Lenia: You know, I have the strangest feeling that it'll be difficult to convince them a peaceful solution is possible. :Lenia: What with the insane people charging towards them with bared steel. :Lenia: "We're going to have to work on the 'Hang back and negotiate" tactic, folks." :Sithis: I don't want negotiate! I'm bloodlust!! :Sithis: I don't want negotiate with bandits anyway ;Negotiations are successful! :Bandit: "Give us your gold, or die!" :Beltarne: We haven't even ASKED if they'd like to negotiate. :Beltarne: Oh. Never mind. There's the negotiation. :Lenia: "Yes, something about insane people charging them with pointy things rather than trying to talk to them." ;Finally! :GM: ' ''Congratulations! ''' You have defeated the defenses of the Caverns of Madness! Category:Saga of Westmarch